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Creating positive behaviour from our little ones Print E-mail
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The discussion times at my baby massage classes have covered alot of interesting topics recently which have got everyone thinking beyond the time that they hold their babies in their arms to the time they become little independent souls who have a mind of their own! As a babies brain doubles in size by the time it is two years old we want to give our children as much input and information that you will think is beyond their years or level of understanding but actually does go in... read on to hear what we discussed aswell as other topics.


Weaning your baby We spoke briefly about this as one of the Mum's has started weaning her six month old and has found it an interesting and enjoyable time. It should be a time that you thoroughly enjoy trying your baby on every taste and flavour of fruit and vegetables, then dairy and meat. It is beneficial to bulk freeze different vegetables using ice cubes trays and then store in freezer bags and get out as and when you need it. You can then use what you need when you need and it cuts down on cooking each day and only cooking once or twice a week. I recommend using Annabel karmel's book as they are very easy to follow and put together different fruit and vegetables you would not have normally mixed. She has a one called 'the complete baby and toddler meal planner' which I started with and still have and use now. I will bring them along next week for you to look at it if you are interested.

Children's parties We had a discussion about how we felt about large childen's parties which cost a fortune, take a lot of time and stress to  organise and look fabulous and impressive to other parents ... the question is do our children need this at such an early age when they have no expectations? Quite a few of us felt not as children tend to enjoy the company of a few close friends as opposed to maybe their whole nursery or school class of 20-30 children - it would be impossible for them to play or interact with all the children at their own party in such a large group. If they have not had a party then four or five friends at their home having a traditional children's party of party games and food, will be a party to them! It is what most of us were brought up on anyway 'the jelly and ice cream party' which I have fond memories of up until the age of 8 or 9.

So why the big parties with an entertainer, different dress theme, bouncy castles, luxury party bags ets etc....I personally feel it is down to the expectations of other parents within a group to do these parties as others do and  keep up with the 'Jone's' as the saying goes. It may also be parents wanting to feel like they are doing something really wonderful for their children. It does detract from what we want our children to get from a celebration at a young age and their expectations as they grow older. In my opinion if you 'peak too soon' your child's expectation of what is good enough for their party will only get bigger!

An interesting topic though as I feel celebrating parties for children can be as simple as a family day out with your child's cousins, grandparents, uncles and aunts etc. Something I have done every year for my daughter's birthday and she loves it aswell as the adults. It is a valuable chance to all meet as a family too. On her actual birthday we have the grandparents for tea and prescent opening afterwards. As a change for her fourth birthday this year I decided to allow her to invite four of her chosen friends to tea, she chose two of my ante natal friends children and two girls from her nursery. Just a simple pasta tea plus a few party games and a cake were what she called a great party and said that she loved it as I gave her a cuddle before bed! That was enough for me....

Everyone has their own way of doing things, what we choose to do is our choice and should not be influenced by others if we feel it is not what we want for our children.

Positive language One of the Mum's spoke warmly about how she tells her daughter exactly what she is doing throughout the day and explains why she is doing it too. As we all agree it is important to talk to our children and almost give them this running commentary of our day for them to learn all the words in our wide vocabularly. It may seem strange as they yet do not have the words to talk but it all goes in and when they start to babble and make various sounds they will have have learnt the art of conversation and start to take turns in talking with you. Using positive language to let our children know the desired behaviour can start from an early age. Always putting the behaviour we require first like 'please lay still so Mummy can out your sleepsuit on' reinforces what you wish your child to do as opposed to saying 'No' or 'dont do that'. One of the Mum's mentioned a friend who shouts at her child and this will only encourage a child to shout back and think this is the right way to communicate.


I hope you have enjoyed reading this and have found it food for thought.


Thanks for your time, Sarah your local baby massage instructor





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